I think I can do that

OK - Let me start by saying, I am no expert at anything. I am a terrible speller and incredibly direct.....none of these indicate that I could be a successful .......Blogger? Or what ever this is. Basically, lower your expectations. After 43 years, I have decided to turn my vicarious living into action. What does this mean???? I spend my free time living through others and their experience. This is odd, as I grew up an extreme extrovert. I have morphed into a person I don't even recognize. Yes - same old mid-life, pre-menopausal story. How am I different? Maybe I'm not, but it is your choice to read or not. I'm mostly sharing for some accountability and a place to get it out. I'm not really sure what "IT" is but I'm sure I'll find out some time.

I have several phrases, I'm known for saying. The two that get me in the most trouble are, "There must be a better way" and "I think I can do that". Sometimes I'm right and sometimes I'm not, but the experience... I usually remember more than the outcome. Currently, in my midlife state, I have a few "projects"....eh..."life choices"......."journeys?" I am focused on.

Weight loss- I have been fat my whole life. Not like ...a little fat, but FAT. The good news is, my whole family is fat. Well...... maybe that isn't exactly good news, but you know what I mean. I don't think I've really felt unaccepted per se... This is definitely not a place for me to talk about my mental scarring from being overweight. But, if I'm being honest with myself, I definitely feel limited. I have boldly decided that I am going to have weight loss surgery. This was something fought for a very long time. I used to say that having this surgery was a punishment for not being able to control yourself. Since then I have learned it is quite the opposite. It is not a punishment - It could be a blessing. Have weight loss surgery…… I think I can do that.

Digital imprint of venerability- I am not one to share on social media. I don't really have anything to hide, and I am not paranoid that people are going to use this information against me. I just never found the need. I like to come up with ideas for new things. I also have a great time just sitting and thinking and planning projects, crafts, design, and general life goals. After going to therapy, and also career counseling, I realized - I have zero idea what makes me happy. Music? I mean, who doesn't like music. TV, movies? Same… this has led me here. Share all the things I like to do in a blog? Instagram? YouTube? I don't really know. But this blog… I think I can do that.

This is what brought me here today. This is what will bring me here in the future. An honest journey through my best tries. Can I do it? I think I can. I guess we'll find out together.